How to Halt Personal Development and Drive People Away
by Andrea Watson | October 24, 2020
Hello again dear readers! Welcome to another day and another blog post. I’ve got some goodies for you in my bag. I’ve made a collection of the other 7 deadly sins you can use today to make people leave and stop your personal growth in it’s tracks. Sound good? No? Well keep reading because everyone can use this information to their advantage. And smile-it’s Saturday!
Playing the Victim
“You make me feel so worthless”
The Victim
Nobody can resist someone who lives their life permanently in the victim role. People who do this display traits such as feeling powerless, holding onto grudges, being frozen in their own lives, getting into arguments easily, and lack of personal responsibility. They might say things like “If you hadn’t hurt me, then I wouldn’t have made that decision” and “I couldn’t go forward with my plan because you never showed up”. Their go-to interpersonal conflict strategy is passive aggression. If you’re looking for a guilt trip at every turn, you’ve come to the right place.
Blaming Others
People who are always blaming others pair nicely with victims. Those who consistently pass the buck do so for a variety of reasons. They need to have an explanation to why something happened. This is a human fault, this need for a reason why. Blaming others is the fallback when there’s nothing else available and they can’t own up to their own sh*t. It’s a great defense mechanism, too. Shifting the blame allows them to avoid reflecting upon themselves or doing any internal inventory. Plus, it’s easy! Why try to fix a problem if you can just overlook it altogether? And one final thing: blaming others is the perfect way to always have an excuse to behave poorly and make bad decisions. What a bargain!
Acting a Fool
Some silliness is appreciated in certain situations in life. However, there comes a point when behaving in a stupid manner to make people laugh gets annoying. The Urban Dictionary’s top definition of acting a fool is:
1) To be “that guy” at a party
2) Being totally unreasonable
3) A dumb ass
4) A shady character
This is no longer just being funny, folks. Acting a fool is a great way to embarrass yourself in public without acknowledging it. It’s also one of the quickest ways to get someone to ignore you. I recommend this behavior to anyone who doesn’t want any true friends.
Being the Martyr
This is always a fun role to play. There is a whole complex built around martyr tendencies. Martyrs always seem to be suffering-and they like it that way. They are constantly ready and willing to share the tale of their latest trial or woe with anyone they come across. They love sympathy, making others feel guilty, and long walks on the beach. A martyr takes pleasure in complaining to others about how you don’t appreciate everything they do for you. Delightful, huh? Try this hat on today!
Using Platitudes
“[Platitudes…] are so dumb that the phrase “dumb platitudes” is redundant.”
RAndy Withers, LCMHC, Blunt-therapy.com
Aah, yes. This is the one that will quickly earn you a one-way ticket to getting slapped in the stupid face. Don’t want that pesky friend hanging around anymore? Blurt out something like “Everything happens for a reason” when they are discussing their problems with you. Or try saying, “It is what it is” in deep conversation. Nobody likes to hear platitudes coming out of your face hole. They are statements you make when you don’t want to think about what another person is saying and feeling.
Getting all Riled Up
Have you ever been in a situation where you or someone you love starts getting huffy, defensive, and belligerent over something they don’t fully understand? Me too! These behavioral displays are the perfect way of saying,”Hey, I’m a big jerk and I’m looking to pick a fight!”. We see this a lot when people are talking politics, during conflict resolution attempts, and in the everyday lives of people who just refuse to grow up.
Hubris
One of the best looking words in the English language, hubris is a combination of arrogance and overconfidence. Think along the lines of “douche bag”People who apply hubris to their lives often fall short of what they are reaching for because it was unreasonable or unattainable to begin with. Because of this, and all the bragging they did beforehand, they often leaves look like fools and making a lot of excuses. Seriously, the sun was in their eyes.
If you are looking to eliminate relationships, make a fool of yourself, or work against personal development, try one of these tactics today! They are sure to put you on the fast track to embarrassment, loneliness, and not being taken seriously. Until next time!
Andrea xo
Life All Day 
True, but then you’re also possibly dealing with people with a history of trauma and personality disorders, mental health conditions that… for whatever reason… these people never found a place in their journey where they developed a thing called “self-awareness”. It’s a catch-22 because obviously the people most likely to display these behaviors don’t have self-awareness. It’s like that phrase “the people who need therapy the most are the ones who would never go…”. If nobody ever influences them in a positive way to open that door they never learn. Seems like it has to be a quiet and slow influence rather than a direct, like, “Hey dude, you need some self-awareness.” It’s a mystery why some people learn and change and other people don’t. I think my comment probably has no real point here, other than thinking out loud. Great post though, and good writing. Thanks for making me thinkg. I just saw 5 other bloggers who never break up paragraphs. Just one long scroll of text. I can’t read that shit. I like how you make your post readable.
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Hi there and thank you for commenting! I agree with what you are saying here. Many people who display these behaviors are dealing with some kind of mental health issue or trauma. I know what it is like to have little to no self-awareness. I was one of the types of people to play the victim when I was younger. I do have mental health issues and past trauma, and I am not sure exactly how I got myself out of that victim role. I think maybe it happened as the pain and mourning faded away. Maybe I was just lucky. You have helped me to see this post from another point of view-thank you for that, and thank you for the follow!
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Sure, anytime. It was a great post :). I used to lack greatly in self-awareness, I think for me aging and my career in HR helped. But I’m an alcoholic and I’m going to rehab next week. Ha. I also appreciated your post about addiction. It seems all the self awareness in the world is not enough for the addict at some point.
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You sure are right about that! I wish you a good journey in rehab!
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Thank you 🙂
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